Donald J. Trump: The Actor

 by Nicholas Lemieux

 

As we approach the final months of his presidency, that is assuming the White House doesn’t go into total lockdown mode, I believe it’s time we reassessed Donald Trump’s character as a whole and analyse a skill of his that rarely gets mentioned in the news.

Donald J. Trump is a man who claims to be many things: a self-made multibillionaire, a competent businessman, a people person, a skilled golfer. All of these claims are somewhat disreputable but I feel that the one trait of Trump that often gets neglected by the media is his gift at acting, as is supported by the rather impressive resume he has amassed over the years through random cameos in both TV and film.

It’s nothing new in American politics for big-name actors to go onto attaining key roles in the government, particularly on the Republican side of things. In the 1950s, no one could’ve imagined that Hollywood star Ronald Reagan would ascend to the White House and don’t even get me started on Arnie’s tenure as the Governator of California. Even in the UK we’ve had cases of our politicians making the daring jump to acting. Remember that time Tony Blair voiced himself on The Simpsons and got mistaken for Mr. Bean by Homer?

For Donald Trump however, acting is a skill that comes across as a natural ability. Look no further than his lengthy career in reality TV, starring in such notable programmes as The Apprentice, Saturday Night Live and, of course, his entire administration (I fully expect an Adam McKay Vice-esque biopic of the Trump years at some point over the next decade). With his showmanship attitude and need to appear the smartest man in the room, it makes sense as to why Trump would want to appear in so many productions both on the big screen and small. Hell, half of his presidential antics already sound like skits on Arrested Development, Four Seasons gaffe included.

In the world of TV, a majority of Trump’s acting consists of random guest spots on family sitcoms in the 90s, a time when the only jokes one could make about the orange man was how much money he had. For instance, in a guest appearance on The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, Trump as well as his then-wife Marla Maples visits the Banks family as a prospective buyer for their mansion. The always-loveable Carlton Banks is especially excited by his bizarre appearance, energetically shouting “it’s the Donald!” and after a misunderstanding, Trump innocently proclaims to the wife whom in six years he will force to sign a confidentiality agreement about their entire marriage “everybody’s always blaming me for everything!”. A shame Twitter hadn’t been invented yet...

In terms of movies, Trump has done his fair share of comedies which retrospectively, in light of how the Hollywood elite completely detests him, makes the clearly forced acting of these characters amazed to be in the presence of such an impressive tycoon all the more cringe worthy. Zoolander had him praise Ben Stiller as the next face of male modelling and Two Weeks Notice featured him awkwardly comforting Hugh Grant after a bad breakup, an exchange which in light of their Twitter beef has aged exceptionally poorly. My personal favourite Trump cameo however was The Little Rascals in which he played the father of bratty rich kid Waldo. Ironically, his compliment of “you’re the best son money can buy” is praise Don Jr. only wishes he could hear.

It should be also noted that a decent chunk of Trump cameos over the years have come about down to compromises in specific filming locations. Namely, Trump would only give directors permission to shoot at his hotels if they wrote a small part for him in the film. This of course is how Trump was able to obtain what is probably his most well-known cameo in Home Alone 2, a bizarre ten-second non sequitur in which he helps give young Kevin McCallister directions in his own hotel. In recent years Trump has heaped praise upon himself for starring in “one of the biggest Christmas hits” whilst Macaulay Culkin commented in a 2018 Q&A that he preferred filming the first one in the franchise since it contained “100 percent less Trump”.

In the world of advertising, Trump made a splash with his collaboration with McDonald. A self-confessed big fan of the fast food chain, McDonald Trump did a bizarre campaign with the old mascot Grimace, a gamble I suppose was paid off when Trump had to arrange food for the White House. There was also his brief stint on WWE when he appeared in a fabricated feud with Vince McMahon which culminated in him shaving Vince’s hair in the wing. Adding to that, he was later inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame in 2013. Make of that what you will.

Before I go, if you really want to bleach your eyeballs for the rest of the day, just look up this video showing Trump fondling his future lawyer Rudy Giuliani in drag, proving that, in addition to Trump, America’s mayor truly did have acting chops before his breakout role in Borat 2 (for a millisecond I genuinely thought he was tucking his shirt ). As for Trump, well you can kinda tell how he ended up meriting two Golden Raspberry awards.